LINGUIST

The old-timey method of looking up the meaning of a word

Vulgarity in Society

In the past, vulgarity was referred to as using colorful language or swearing like a sailor. It was out of place during High Tea or while attending church. But amongst the first words  most young people want to learn in a new language are the ‘bad’ ones so you can sneak a few past your parents at the dinner table. Back in the day, the consequences were no worse than the threatened washing your mouth out with soap.

Fast forward to our Politically Correct climate where certain ‘trigger’ words seem to leave people ‘utterly devastated’. Blue Jay’s fielder, Kevin Pillar, yells the old term for a British smoke (fag) during the heat of the moment and he’s almost in tears afterwards in the press scrum talking about his 2 game suspension. Anaheim Ducks Captain, Ryan Getzlaf, shouted ‘Fucking Cocksucker’ at a referee during a game and received the highest fine the NHL is allowed to levy. The media immediately trotted out offended and disappointed homosexuals for their reactions and the last bastion of male dominance has been brought to their knees. Hockey players are literally beating each other black and blue with barely controlled violence but a tasteless insult offends and shocks the sensibilities to the point where it must be smote from on high?

Trigger words come and go as time changes what is culturally acceptable. Some heinous words are forbidden to utter under any circumstances. The ‘N’ word is so verboten, it caused a minor uproar during a recent Canadian Senate committee meeting that was debating the deletion of gender pronouns. The ‘C’ word that describes a nasty woman is an example of a particularly unpleasant retort that offends women of an older generation. Homophobic slurs that were very common to my generation have now been elevated to the infamous status of displaying a swastika or shouting ‘Sieg Heil’.

Offensive language is language and has been used throughout history. If you can get past the hurt feelings and censoring, it is interesting to learn where certain terms come from. ‘Cracker’ seems to have a long, rich history and was used to describe ‘white trailer trash’ as far back as the 1590’s. Quebecers were called ‘Pepsi’s‘ because they couldn’t afford the more expensive Coca Cola. Acadian swear words do not follow typical anatomical or sexual idioms and make little sense outside of the Roman Catholic context. Cup, tent or The Host (en francais, câlisse, tabarnak, osti) when used as vulgarity make people in Paris laugh because they sound like nonsense words. Chilean curses are a bit confusing depending on context. For example, ‘Weon‘ depending on who says it and the inflection can mean an endearing term for a buddy or a crude way of calling you a fucker. As for the Newfies, a faggot to them is a pile of half fried codfish, so heaven knows what they’re saying.

Coming back to the Senate meetings, it may seem silly that the larger populace may someday be criminally restrained from using gender pronouns because it offends the transgender and gay communities. But the fluffy, homogeneous, marshmallow PC censor’s goal is to make society as bland as tapioca pudding.  Label everything that could be possibly offensive to any minority group as hate speech (eg. Bill M-103) and you will be able to curb free speech and to guide us into their Orwellian future.

After a quick perusal of the online Merriam-Webster dictionary, I easily found each naughty word used in this essay and its meaning. Should we adopt Orwellian theory and have a good old fashioned electronic book burning erasing all traces of ‘offensive’ literature? Maybe instead of pulling our hair out over a few obnoxious insults, we should take a step back and put vulgar language into perspective. I don’t think a hurled word here and there needs the wrath of social justice raining down on the offender. Save that righteous indignation for those who preach and practise intolerance.

But instead, I fear the PC crowd will not be happy until Ministry of Truth Thought Police reprogram us all at the Ministry of Love.

Blair’s LinkedIn Profile

Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades and Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add the title Blogger to the list.

SANDBAGGING GRUNT

The utilitarian sandbag, aka this year’s Ontario and Quebec lawn ornament

Reformation of Canadian Emergency Measures

Irrespective of the political mantra of preparing for an increased frequency of fires, flood and pestilence in Canada due to climate change, the average person should be prepared to go 72 hours relying on their own resources before expecting help from government services. Considering a significant number of people still die from BBQ Carbon Monoxide poisoning after the heat goes out, I would say the average person is woefully under-prepared to fend for themselves.

This last round of flooding in Quebec demonstrated the short-comings of our collective response to fluid situations during a disaster response. To begin with, the municipalities who are the front line responders to a crisis are also the same people who authorized putting people into harm’s way to begin with! Land and home owners are local governments largest source of tax income. Yes, the home owner should be doing some due diligence but they are relying on a real estate agent who is trying to make a sale and a hope that the municipality wouldn’t have zoned a house to be built in an unsafe area. Local politicians need to be operating more at arm’s length from the process. But it works out as a good deal because they’re playing the odds of a natural catastrophe being low and then if one does happen, they know the Federal government will pick up the tab. If I were the Feds, I would set up a different system to mitigate zoning habitation in known danger areas.

The next major change should be a more robust role for the military. As the system stands in Canada, a provincial government has to make a formal request for help to the Federal government for the troops to come in. This is called Aid to the Civil Power. Usually after a situation gets away from the local authority, the cries are heard of why wasn’t the military called sooner? There are many reasons such as:

  • Provincial and local officials/organizations do not have the experience to know when they’re getting over their heads. They have neither the training nor knowledge to adequately respond to larger incidents and can quickly be overwhelmed.
  • There may be a reluctance to call the military due to past incidents and prejudices. Oka officials weren’t too keen to have the troops come help in their flooded community.[1]
  • Pride is a factor. Newfoundland officials were reticent to call in the military in the aftermath of Hurricane Igor. Premier Danny Williams wasn’t a big supporter of Prime Minister Stephen Harper and this probably led to a delay in acceptance of federal aid.[2]
  • Perceived costs related to military aid are a factor. By the books, if the military is called in, the province is to pick up the tab. In reality, the Federal government will tally up a bill but only collects partial or no payment.

Under Minister Ralph Goodale, Public Safety Canada[3] coordinates the response to natural disasters. Their efforts trickle down to provincial, city and municipal Emergency Preparedness offices with varying success. Some jurisdictions such as Vancouver are very well prepared but that was because of the lead up to the Winter Olympic Games. One of the best legacies to come from that event was the implementation of E-Comm. E-Comm is a pan-communications system whereby all the disparate emergency services can talk to one another. Previously, the Lower Mainland’s many services wouldn’t have been able to coordinate relief efforts after a significant incident, such as an earthquake. But most areas of Canada don’t have the luxury of monies showered upon them for emergency preparedness, so they make do.

This is why military personnel should be co-managing the Emergency Management Centers (EMCs) similar to the model of the Joint Rescue Coordination Centers. Provincial officials and agencies lack the resources, knowledge and management experience of military personnel. They may run the occasional exercise to test their responsiveness but running exercises is the military’s raison d’etre. Military personnel typically have more experience dealing with, planning for and managing actual emergency situations. From day one in Basic, you’re put under pressure and taught how to survive, function and lead with little sleep, food, supplies or resources. This training plus a substantial bank of discipline, knowledge and expertise is continually honed throughout their entire career. During Brigadier General Turenne’s Operation LENTUS presentation[4] on the recent New Brunswick ice storm military response, he said that you could see the relief of the civilian responders immediately once the troops appeared. The locals were quickly becoming overwhelmed after a few days by even the simple tasks. As the BGen explained, his troops are agile, adaptable, scalable and responsive. Civilian officials/organizers/responders do not have the built-in tools, training or experience of military personnel at managing larger scale emergencies.

Since the military is going to back-stop the efforts of the local authorities, they should have a louder voice on the timing of the deployment and should be able to side-step the provincial officials. Currently, the admirals and generals are already keeping tabs on the domestic front through regular briefings on their areas of responsibility. They are well aware of possible problem incidents and if need be start the Warning Order process and concurrent activity in order to lean forward as much as possible. Their hands are somewhat tied as they have to wait for their official government marching orders. They’ll prod the provincial officials to consider calling for help sooner than later. Meanwhile, military units are quietly pre-positioning resources and personnel because they know the call is coming. If we already had military in the EMCs, they would be able to recognize the need for higher assistance earlier and would bring expertise to the table that their civilian counterparts are lacking. In the Navy or the Air force you’re taught to stay ahead of the ship or aircraft, not to swim in the wake.

The burning of the Town of Slave Lake in 2011 is a good example of when military management would have been more successful. The whole disaster could have been mitigated or avoided all together by the simple accessing of a weather briefing. Military members are constantly receiving or giving briefings in order to disseminate pertinent information. Every briefing starts with a Met Tech report on the forecast weather with associated meteorological products. I’m pretty sure the response to the small wildfires outside of town would have been beefed up if someone had paid attention to the forecast windstorm with its associated 100 kph gusts approaching. Even the Final Report on the Lessons Learned[5] from the fire makes no mention of keeping an eye on weather forecasts.  Civilians have access to important resources but they are either unaware or are ignorant of how to use them.

Minister Goodale noted in a recent press conference that they were going to take another look at the mechanism for responding to future Canadian disasters. Provincial officials should be given less latitude and the Federal government should give the military more latitude to respond without waiting for the red tape, egos and inexperienced civilians to catch up with fast flowing events. The Federal government is effectively picking up the tab anyways and the experts in the military should be running the show.

[1] The Oka Grand Chief unilaterally decided to decline the military’s offer of assistance citing possible hard feelings from the Oka crisis that occurred 27 years ago. Despite an all-out band effort, 30 homes were flooded and 8 were evacuated. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/montreal/army-s-offer-to-help-with-kanesatake-flooding-revives-memories-of-oka-crisis-1.4106827

[2] The destructive force of Hurricane Igor was well predicted ahead of time. In addition, calls for federal assistance were delayed or never made. This exasperated the recovery of the storm’s victims. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/newfoundland-labrador/n-l-s-post-igor-response-disgusting-resident-1.1022158

[3] Public Safety Canada website. https://www.publicsafety.gc.ca/index-en.aspx

[4] A PDF copy of BGen Turenne’s Operation LENTUS 17-01 presentation. https://rusi-ns.ca/op-lentus-17-01/

[5] PDF copy of Lesser Slave Lake Regional Urban Interface Wildfire – Lessons Learned. http://www.aema.alberta.ca/documents/0426-Lessons-Learned-Final-Report.pdf

 

CORONER’S ASSISTANT – PART II

Update to The Insanity of Canadian Family Justice

Well, it’s been an extra three months since I wrote the original blog on my SOB story about trying to wring a modicum of justice out of the Canadian Family Court System. I am sad to report that I am even further behind in my fight, I’m in a tighter spiral and the ground is coming up fast! I absolutely understand how people can contemplate violent solutions to this type of problem.

Contrary to advice from Legal Aid, NS lawyers and the NS Family Supreme Court, I cannot fight my court battles here from NS. Even though the NS Government site has step by step guidelines for Interjurisdictional Support Orders, a judge on April 13 took about five minutes to dismiss my case as not part of her jurisdiction. Her only advice for me was to contact a lawyer. Poof! Four months of my life wasted on this particular legal goose chase plus another $8000+ added to the arrears tally.

So, I’m now at the point where the only choice I have left is to balloon the credit card that I’m barely able to make minimum payments on in the faint hope that I can buy some justice. Thankfully, I was finally able to speak to a knowledgeable NS lawyer who basically said I have to fight this in BC with a lawyer there. Well, back to the drawing board I went and randomly found a firm that had someone who would listen to me at $220/hr. A $2500 retainer later (on the credit card) and we’ll fight the first fight to get NS Family Maintenance off my back for the $2150/mth Spousal Support. This particular bill keeps ratcheting upwards with the assorted multi-hundred dollar fines each and every month. I might get a two to three month reprieve whenever we can get a court date and a court order. Who knows how long that will take but I’m not holding my breath. The court and Family Maintenance will be pushing hard for me to find work because they will be calling me a slacker irrespective of the employment climate here in the Maritimes (ie. I’m not from here, few connections plus high unemployment…good luck to me) Also, I can’t take a low paying job, again since I was making so much before, they’ll again accuse me of slacking. Conversely, Heidi has no such pressure to better her position. She can just slide along where she’s at and will never have to change a thing about looking for better employment. Double standard maybe?!?

Oh, and get this: no matter what situation she is in with her new husband and their standard of living, in all likelihood, I will have to pay her a substantial amount of Spousal Support for the rest of her life! But that’s fight number two after I get the court to acknowledge that I physically can’t comply with their present Court Order. Cha-ching, that’ll be a few more thousands of dollars for the lawyer.

Whenever I speak to lawyers about my situation, my blood begins to boil and the anger wells up. It was obvious she had heard this same anger from others in my situation. She agreed with me that the law was stupid but it is how the game is rigged. Hey, we’re mostly middle-aged white guys, why not stick it to us? She was also curious about the high amount of arrears that had been levied against me. I told her that I had placed the welfare of my university kids and grandchild ahead of the ex. I couldn’t help them as much as I wanted to financially over the years but I did the best that I could. The lawyer stated that my financial obligations were to my ex and not my children. How sick and twisted is the law to put her needs totally ahead of the kids? I already know how much of a greedy b*tch she is but it’s sad that the law is slanted so much.

So, to sum up, waiting on the BC lawyer to draw up the necessary court documents that need serving on Heidi and registered with the BC Supreme Court. Then we wait for a court date. Then hopefully there is some justice and a court order that makes some sense. Then I have to take a certified original copy of that order to the NS Supreme Court and register it with them. Then that gets transmitted to NS Family Maintenance and they might be off my back for a month or two. Then somewhere in there, I might be gainfully employed and may be able to keep from going bankrupt over the credit card exploding. Then we start the whole merry-go-round up again to see what the next round of Spousal Support will be.

P.S. Heidi, her lawyer and her Family Maintenance minions are working overtime to drain me dry. Their zeal would make the guards at Auschwitz blush. So in addition to the threat of randomly revoking my driver’s license and passport (which may have already happened as they weren’t going to give me notice), I found out the other day that they’re taking even more of my EI payments. They were garnishing $460/every two weeks leaving me $460 to live on. Last week, the bank account looked even sadder than normal and I see they’re giving her $498 and I only get $422 now. That’s why my daughter’s birthday card will only have well wishes instead of a 20 or two.

Again, if you happen to come across Heidi Jensen or her husband Don Croitor who live in Victoria, BC, feel free to ask them how they can live with themselves.

Blair’s LinkedIn Profile

ANTI-DRUG SOLDIER

Her Majesty’s Canadian Ship (HMCS) ATHABASKAN comes up along side a Vessel Of Interest while on patrol during Op CARIBBE, October 1, 2014. ©DND 2014
Photo by: Cpl Anthony Chand, Formation Imaging Services Halifax

The Ridiculous War on Drugs

The ‘War on Drugs’ in North America has been ongoing for about a century now. Canada prohibited opium with the Opium Act in 1908 as part of the government’s racist policies concerning Asians[1]. Also, around this time, the States were using racism and fear-mongering to make drugs like marijuana illegal[2] and of course used a Constitutional amendment in 1919 to prohibit alcohol. Canada also prohibited alcohol with PEI banning the booze starting in 1901 with all provinces except Quebec joining in by 1917. The Canadian prohibition movement slowly started to lose steam with PEI being the last hold-out in 1948[3]. Other drugs like marijuana and cocaine were quietly put on the books during this time and Western governments have been fighting the drug-using portions of their populations ever since.

In the interests of full disclosure, here is the extent of my personal experimentation with illicit drugs. Growing up in Kelwood, MB, I knew there was access to marijuana. I even heard some rumours of cocaine floating around. Alcohol was my drug of choice and occasionally as a young man I went to a house or bush party for some drinking. Later in university, alcohol was again my favourite drug. I joined the military at the age of 19, so I stayed away from other drugs due to the punitive measures associated with them. Since I had limited experience with drugs, including smoking, it was an eye-opening experience to see the marijuana culture on Vancouver Island when I moved there in 2000. Finally, in my mid-thirties I tried a few puffs, had one too many pot cookies and tried a magic mushroom. The experimentation didn’t do much for me plus I was headed back towards jobs in the Coast Guard and military where strict measures against illegal drug use were in place. So if you’re looking for an expert on the affects of drugs other than alcohol, you need someone else’s advice. As for alcohol, I love the depth and breadth of varieties available from all over the world but that product is mostly legal with various restrictions. I use alcohol because I like the taste and social aspects of this particular drug. I do not abuse alcohol because of the after effects and societal penal measures.

So why the revelation of my limited drug experience? I want to make the point that the so-called War on Drugs has been ridiculous, wasteful and is directly financing criminal organizations. Human beings for various reasons need outlets to socialize, cope or to enhance their lives. Some turn to religion, hobbies, gambling, booze, smoking, other drugs, you name it. For the vast majority of people, they can function quite fine thank you and what I do doesn’t affect you so stay out of my business. A tiny minority end up harming themselves and others. So what’s society’s first response to a person exhibiting a drug problem? Punitive measures. America is the worst with a drug related incarceration rate that has gone off the charts[4]. Even up in Canada, you have to be scared of even one drink before driving up to a Check Stop. Culturally, we have been taught to demonize drug users as morally reprehensible addicts, pot heads with reefer madness[5] or criminals on the marginal edges of society. Until Canadian law changes next year[6], simple marijuana possession results in criminal records for tens of thousands of Canadians annually.[7] The 30 gram personal use limit being talked about currently could result in a Possession for the Purposes of Trafficking minimum sentence of 1-2 years[8]. Obviously, with so many heavy disciplinary measures against drug use, citizens should have long ago been scared straight and like me, been satisfied with the state allowing you to enjoy a few drinks.

Instead, U.S. and Canadian citizens have disregarded ever increasing draconian drug laws, vilifying propaganda, and alarmist political hyperbole to the point where marijuana first was legalized for medical use, then recreational use in a few states, to universal availability next year for Canada. Similar to alcohol prohibition, the populace using the herb has increased to the point where the costs and numbers are so high, the state overlords have conceded defeat.[9] Marijuana use has been steadily increasing despite concerted government efforts[10]. Personally, I do not particularly like Justin Trudeau’s government but I believe he is correct to reform the cannabis laws. Alternatively, Kellie Leitch, one of the Conservative Party leader contenders has a strong position against marijuana and I believe that stance will hurt her. The population has spoken and the efforts of the narcs have gone up in smoke.

So why do so many people use illegal drugs when the consequences can be so dire? From my observations, I believe that humans need outlets of some sort especially during times of stress. Marriage partners wouldn’t cheat on one another if they were happy in their union. Self-harming behaviors increase as you become more depressed. For example, anxious American soldiers in Vietnam used copious amounts of heroin in order to function[11]. Even fairly happy people enjoy a break from everyday reality on occasion, hence TGIF for the Air Force and Weepers for the Navy. I saw an interesting example of ‘letting loose’ from the Jordanian military officers who were on language training with me in Quebec. They were devout Muslims, praying five times a day (which included a middle of the night prayer), no pork, no alcohol and no womanizing. Pretty much a no fun kind of life compared to Western soldiers. But pull out the hookah pipe (their term was Hubbly Bubbly) and they would become giddy as school girls. No, they explained, it was straight tobacco, a harsh manly variety, not that flavoured Western stuff made for women. All humans use some form of activity to escape from reality. If your reality is particularly bad then you might turn to a harsh drug to compensate. But if you’re caught out, then society labels you a moral failure and is likely to toss in a criminal record for good measure. Three guesses as to whether that will make your life better or worse.

I am not advocating handing out pot candies to seven year olds or letting people shoot up heroin on every street corner. What makes eminent sense to logical, sane people who have seen the affects of drugs, is to decriminalize the practice and approach the issue from a health, harm reduction point of view. I worked for a short period of time in the Main and Hastings area of Vancouver as a Coroner’s assistant. It is hell on earth and the land of walking zombies. The downward spiral that brings a person to this point is short lived as by my rough estimate most of the junkies had a life expectancy of 6 to 24 months. We would make bets on how soon we would be picking up a particular walking corpse. Plus, sad to say, the sooner they die, the sooner they stop being a horrendous financial drain[12]. I also worked as a first aid attendant at GM Place in Vancouver and observed substantial drug use and their different affects. If you worked a Garth Brooks concert with the stadium full of wannabe cowboys drinking beer, you were guaranteed to have fist fights. But when the Upper Bowl was obscured from all the pot smoke during an Ozzy Osbourne concert, the crowd calmly dispersed home after his voice gave out on the third song. Alcoholics create much more mayhem compared to pot smokers. Even hard drug users could be productive members of society if society wouldn’t knock out all their support structures. If you want proof, then Portugal is the poster child for total decriminalization of all drugs[13].

We already have proof that a public health approach works better than a stick over the head method. While I was in BC, it was more socially acceptable to light up a doobie than it was to have a smoke. After years of getting the message out to smokers that the habit was detrimental to everyone’s health, rates especially amongst the young have steadily decreased. The same can be said for binge drinking and alcohol abuse. I say the same approach should be taken to deal with all harmful substances. Most people realize that huffing glue, snorting coke, smoking Meth, shooting heroin, downing a 40 ouncer nightly, or whatever your poison, probably isn’t the best of life choices. But if they want to engage in harmful practices and stick poison into their bodies then that’s up to them and if it’s not bothering anyone then that’s their business. Just over a hundred years ago, when you could buy opium syringe kits and heroin through Sears and Roebucks[14], the government decided to get concerned with what people were putting into their bodies. But instead of studying and regulating the issue, it became the age of prohibition. Too bad that as a society we didn’t implement an educational, supportive system to give hope and a way out to individuals who overreach their personal capabilities and let their habits get away from them. The retributive approach has more than proven to be a costly and total waste of effort.

Newspaper ad for children’s cocaine toothache drops

I have a medal for my Operation CARIBBE[15] participation with the Royal Canadian Navy. On my two trips, we hassled a few vessels, scared a few ‘go-fasts’ into jettisoning their cargo and ran a cargo ship out of fuel. That ship was subsequently towed to Guantanamo Bay, stripped and let loose after nothing was found. I vividly recall when my destroyer ‘pulled over’ a Canadian sailing vessel and relieved the man of his baggie of weed. Under the auspices of a UN charter, our US Coast Guard ‘muscle’ boarded, searched and confiscated a miniscule amount of plant material from a man minding his own business out in international waters. I was sickened and ashamed of my role. Even when the interdiction forces are somewhat more successful such as during the recent cocaine seizures on the West side with HMCS Saskatoon, they only stop a small fraction of the drug flow[16]. The War on Drugs by any measure has been a spectacular flop.

Compounding the abject failure to slow down the drug flow to populations that are clamoring for more product, is the fact that money from the drug sales is going into the hands of really, really bad people. Before the purported CIA machinations in pre-Soviet Afghanistan, there was little opium trade in the area. Now, the Taliban run and profit from an industry that supplies close to 90% of the world’s opium[17]. Mexico’s infamous Joaquin “El Chapo” Guzman was on the Forbes World’s Billionaires List for several years running. Columbian cocaine cartels have enough excess cash to start building their own mini-submarine fleets. These are particularly nasty people who are financing their nefarious organizations off the insatiable demand for their goods. Why in heaven’s name do we not legalize everything and cut their business out from under them? Instead we just keep financing them, spend billions on wasted enforcement efforts and needlessly destroy people’s lives.

Thankfully some common sense is percolating through political channels here in North America. After cannabis legalization goes through next year, I might grow a plant or two for the novelty and may even have a joint or a pot candy. I am more excited for the return of hemp and all the useful products that can be produced from the plant[18].

Happy 4:20 Day!

[1] Opium was in use by Asians in Vancouver and future Prime Minister Mackenzie King was investigating the 1907 anti-Asian riots for the federal government. It was feared that opium smoking would become popular with white people hence the beginning of drug prohibitions. Marijuana was criminalized in 1923. https://www.vice.com/en_ca/article/high-history-a-look-back-at-canadian-weed-law

[2] Marijuana was touted as a drug that would drive you insane like the crazy Mexicans. White women would sleep with the Negro, you would listen to devil jazz music and you would murder your family with an axe. California was the first state in 1913 to outlaw the plant. http://www.drugwarrant.com/articles/why-is-marijuana-illegal/

[3] Prohibition in Canada was promoted as doing your patriotic duty for King and Country during World War I. Alcohol went underground and numerous ‘speakeasies’ or ‘blind pigs’ sprung up to quench people’s thirst. http://www.thecanadianencyclopedia.ca/en/article/prohibition/

[4] America by far incarcerates more of its citizens than any other country in the world. Russia and Rwanda are next at 2/3rds of America’s rate. Canada is in 8th place at about 1/7th of the top rate. From 1925 to 1962, US citizens in State and Federal prisons slowly rose from about 100,000 to 200,000. Then in 1973, the numbers rose exponentially to 2.2 million Americans locked up today with another 4.7 million on probation. A full half of the Federal prisons are full of people on non-violent drug charges. From 1980 to 2015, the drug incarceration rate rose from 8% to 21% of the total prison population. State costs for locking everyone up has ballooned from 6.7 billion in 1985 to 56.9 billion in 2015. http://sentencingproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/Trends-in-US-Corrections.pdf

[5] Reefer Madness (1936) is a cult film about how good white kids can be hooked on pot. After one joint, they will turn to a life of toking, jazz and despair. The propaganda plays into the fears that teenagers will use marijuana as a gateway drug and ruin their lives. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhQlcMHhF3w

[6] The Liberal government has proposed to legalize and regulate Cannabis by mid-2018. https://www.canada.ca/en/services/policing/justice/legalization-regulation-marijuana.html

[7] Over the years, even Canadian Police Associations have recognized the overly punitive penalties for simple marijuana possession are counter-productive. Stats for 2007 indicated that of the 100,000 drug possession charges, 47,000 were for marijuana. The associated criminal charges end up being very costly to society and the persons involved. http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2013/08/20/canada-marijuana-laws-criminal-charges_n_3785957.html

[8] 30 grams of pot, the equivalent of a full baggie, could easily be construed as an amount large enough to traffic which would result in a lengthy minimum sentence. http://www.marijuanalaws.ca/penalties.html

[9] In 2012, an estimated 3.4 million or 12.2% of Canadians used marijuana. 43% of all Canadians have tried it at some point. Strangely, NS had the highest use of 16% versus BC use of 14.5%. A older woman living in a Saskatchewan rural area has the lowest usage percentage. http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/82-003-x/2015004/article/14158-eng.htm

[10] Stats from 2013 estimate that close to 10% of Americans have used illicit drugs in the last month which is up almost 10% in a decade. Marijuana, used by about 6% of the population, is the drug of choice with other illicit drug use generally holding steady or in decline except for Meth which has upticked. Interestingly, nonmedical prescription drug use is about a third of the rate of marijuana use. Alcohol and tobacco use, dependency and abuse rates are all steadily decreasing. Source: National Institute on Drug Abuse; National Institutes of Health; U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/drugfacts/nationwide-trends

[11] Time Magazine reported that 20% of American soldiers were doing heroin while in Vietnam. Paradoxically, 95% of these ‘hooked on heroin’ junkies mostly quit on their own once returning to Stateside presumably to a more pleasant environment. The theory is if you place a person in an austere, hopeless environment with little human interaction and little hope, they will take solace in what’s available such as drugs. Give them better choices and they will shy away from self-harming behaviors. Source – Chasing The Scream: The First And Last Days of the War on Drugs by Johann Harl. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063

[12] In 2014, the Vancouver Sun reported on the actual per person costs of a downtown Eastside junkie. Over a five year period, 300 people cost the province just in health, social welfare and justice services about $90,000 each. All the other social services associated with their care were estimated to substantially increase the costs of their care. http://www.vancouversun.com/health/pete+mcmartin+high+cost+misery+vancouver+downtown+eastside/11632586/story.html

[13] In 2001, in order to combat the country’s drug issues, Portugal decriminalized the use of all drugs. The experiment has been quite successful due to a public health approach versus criminal. http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/portugal-decriminalised-drugs-14-years-ago-and-now-hardly-anyone-dies-from-overdosing-10301780.html

[14] Opium, laudanum, cocaine and morphine were widely available in America. If you couldn’t get to a store, you could order it along with a syringe kit through the popular mail-order catalogue. Cocaine drops were for your teething children and genteel white woman of Temperance associations took tonics (laudanum) as nightcaps. Source – Drugs Across the Spectrum, Raymond Goldberg, page 172. https://books.google.ca/books?id=EZlsCgAAQBAJ&pg=PA172&lpg=PA172&dq=sears+and+roebuck+selling+opium+kits&source=bl&ots=G_oufuo_dQ&sig=YPYiC8cMSeemgmp-F0SLTd8tkfw&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjZlreFtbHTAhVHzVQKHWEVC2wQ6AEIZTAN#v=onepage&q=sears%20and%20roebuck%20selling%20opium%20kits&f=false

[15] The RCN regularly sends ships and aircraft to the West and East Caribbean for drug interdiction operations with a host of other countries all led by the US Coast Guard. http://www.forces.gc.ca/en/operations-canada-north-america-recurring/op-caribbe.page

[16] During a 2016 UN conference to discuss the issue, despite the billions spent on drug interdiction, this is a Golden Age of Drug Trafficking. Just the cost of my ship down in the Eastern Caribbean for a month’s patrol cost in the range of 3 to 4 million. https://news.vice.com/article/drug-trafficking-meth-cocaine-heroin-global-drug-smuggling

[17] Worldwide profits from illegal drugs are conservatively estimated at $500 billion/yr. Afghan farmers would like to grow crops other than poppies but between the profits and pressure from the Taliban, they are unable. http://www.globalresearch.ca/the-spoils-of-war-afghanistan-s-multibillion-dollar-heroin-trade/91

[18] During World War II, due to a shortage of rope making material for Navy ships, prohibition against hemp was lifted. Due to a quirk in the law, this very useful plant was again prohibited after the war. The THC content is very low, (< 1%) so you would have to smoke an inordinate amount to get high. https://www.leafly.com/news/cannabis-101/hemp-101-what-is-hemp-whats-it-used-for-and-why-is-it-illegal

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Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades and Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add the title Blogger to the list.

CURLER

My collection of pins from numerous events and clubs

Canada’s Other Winter Sport

Although in most Canadian’s minds, they would say that hockey is Canada’s sport, hopefully a few of them have paid attention to the formidable performances of our national teams during the 2017 World competitions in China and Edmonton. Ontario’s Rachel Homan and Newfoundland’s Brad Gushue Canadian teams have been perfect throughout play, stringing together a perfect streak of wins. Gushue has put on an absolute curling clinic going the full ten ends only three times in the twelve games played so far. Hopefully, he will make it a lucky 13 with one more win over Sweden’s Niklas Edin’s rink tonight.

***Update from last night’s win over Sweden, the men’s and women’s teams went perfect at the World’s this year. Gushue’s rink could arguably be the best team ever considering they only had to play 4 complete games out of 13. For the first time ever, one country has all the reigning champions of World’s and Olympics.***

Hat from the second to last Schooner Spiel as the base closed in 1991

I started curling during my posting to CFB Summerside from 1989-91. I took up the sport to keep active and for the social aspects. It is very gentlemanly when you’re having a bad game to be able to shake hands early and go for a beer.

Pins from my time on the Great Red Mud

My first rink with Paul Dobbs curled out of the CFB club, the Hack & Hog. We entered the Tankard Bonspiel for the Island up in the O’Leary club. Due to the small size of the province, it was relatively easy to get a Tankard pin compared to the rest of Canada.

Pins from military bonspiels

I was able to participate in a couple of military bonspiels in Ottawa and CFB Cornwallis, NS. Bonspiels were a regular staple of military bases back then.

Pins from the five clubs I curled at in Saskatoon, SK

Fairly soon after I left the military in 1991, we moved to Saskatoon and from 1992-93, I was fairly serious about curling. Our team from the CNR club off Fairlight Drive worked hard and did well. I was able to curl in all of Saskatoon’s five clubs.

Pins from the BC Lower Mainland

When we moved to Vancouver in 1995, I was lucky to have a rink five minutes from our New Westminster home, the Royal City Club. I was quite busy with work and the kids, so curling started to take a back seat.

Comox Valley, BC club pins

Once we moved over to Vancouver Island, it was again difficult to regularly get down to the club in Courtenay, BC.

The old Kelwood Curling Club building

Growing up in Kelwood, I was more of a hockey player instead of a curler. I did play a few games through the school at the old town rink using Mom’s old Rink Rat for a broom. As a sweeper, you had to slap those old fabric brooms pretty hard to be effective.

Rink Rat Brooms

We were cooling our heels in Winnipeg waiting for the furniture to show up from Summerside and there were tickets for the event still. Graham was only a few months old and he got a bit of TV coverage when I was walking him around. Unfortunately, Kevin Martin’s rink lost to Scotland. It was back before the Free Guard zone and the teams back then just played a peel game, so if you went down a couple of points, there was no way back.

Memorable Manitoba curling pins

I wasn’t able to curl very often after rejoining the military back in 2007 but I was able to curl occasionally in Portage while I was there for pilot training.

The start of my Halifax collection

It will be easier to spend regular time with a team now that my military days are done. Sailing with the Navy made it difficult to commit to a team so I was only able to play as a spare at the base club.

I dragged Tina to the World Men’s competition and unfortunately Canada’s John Morris rink ended up in third with Sweden’s Niklas Edin winning the tournament.

Sweden has a tough team and Brad Gushue will have to be sharp to make it past him tonight. The team from the Rock has held up magnificently this past week and curling fans will enjoy watching the Battle of the Rocks tonight.

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SURVIVALIST

Sunrise during the approach to Torres del Paine, Chile

Torres del Paine

Of the five months I spent in Chile, I had a few days that will stick with me for the rest of my life. One of the more memorable was the day I spent in a Chilean National Park, Torres del Paine (Blue Towers).

(Link to Youtube video of Puerto Natales Creation Wall)

The vista from my Puerto Natales hotel room

The jumping off point for the park is a small tourist town of Puerto Natales. It is full of outfitter stores, guide and souvenir shops and an amazing pictorial wall depicting the Chilean version of creation. Since the town receives significant numbers of international visitors, there wasn’t an issue with communicating in English.

The southern edge of the park with the iconic Cuernos del Paine shrouded in cloud

I was fortunate to finally have a clear day for my expedition and it started with a spectacular sunrise as I drove north towards the park. As I continued my day, I lamented over the fact that I only had my Galaxy III phone to take pictures with. If I had the chance to go back, I would choose an extended stay and bring a proper camera in order to document the fantastic vistas and abundant wildlife.

Brilliant blue icebergs floating in Grey Lake

As you approach the park, you come upon a wide plain with the iconic Cuernos del Paine (Blue Horns) in the background. I headed towards Grey Lake and along the way just about drove off the gravel road I was on. I had seen the first of my gorgeous blue icebergs (hielo) of the day. There’s a glacier at the far end of the lake where large chunks of ice cleave off into the water. Apparently, the high amounts of oxygen create the brilliant blue. As the ice breaks into smaller pieces, it turns crystal clear. I saved a piece, melted it down and returned to Canada with some authentic glacier water for special occasions. When I dropped off some Chilean gifts to my Grandmother at her resthome in Creston, BC, we shared a drink. We also snuck in a drink of rhubarb liquor native to that region. Grandma appreciated it!

Guanaco silhouetted by the mountains of Torres del Paine

Further along in my explorations, I started coming across guanaco. I had been despairing that Chile had no land mammals as I had seen practically no wildlife in my travels to that point. Of course, I took several pictures of my first novel wild llama encounter! Then I saw more and more and more and finally a gigantic herd! They were not particularly afraid of me and I was able to approach the outer edge to within about 20′. They were more pissed at me than anything as a few of the animals were laying their ears back and hissing. The burnt brush was from an accidental tourist fire back in 2011.

(Link to Youtube video of my guanaco herd encounter)

Huge herd of guanaco along a hillside

After leaving the llamas behind, I continued with my explorations. I took a short hike to a famous cascada nearby. It doesn’t show in the pictures but the area is known for high winds and I was battling 40-50kt gusts for most of the day. Next, I began driving again and for the second time that day just about hit the ditch. I had spied a flash of pink out of the corner of my eye and after stopping saw a flock of flamingos! Chile actually has two varieties of the bird. Unfortunately, they were too far away for me to take a proper photo.

Salto Grande waterfall creating a familiar Arco Iris (rainbow)

As I drove down to a remote ranger station, I finally glimpsed high in the sky majestic condors soaring in the thermals. As the condor is the national bird of Chile, I was hoping to see one on my travels. Soon after, I came across another Chilean bird which caused me to slam on the brakes. Pecking at the ground, a few feet from the car was a substantial sized, flightless bird. I was afraid of it being startled, but it didn’t pay too much attention to me until I got out of the vehicle and started walking towards it. These rheas (ñandú) are not hunted and have a land speed of @40mph, so they aren’t afraid of a human on foot. The flock was another pleasant, surprising sight on top of all the others I saw that day. The last birds I came across were a small flock of Magellan geese (caiquén). The males are white and the females are brown and I was told they mate for life.

Nandú nonchalantly walking by the side of the road

I wasn’t finished with the wildlife extravaganza even when I left the park. I had stopped to take some pictures of local sheep (I noticed that their tails weren’t docked as is the practise elsewhere in the world) and I was fortunate to see a zorro (Patagonian Fox) skulking about. It might have been hunting the numerous liebre europea (European hare). I had come across two types of rabbits that day. The liebre were black and white, resembling long eared jack rabbits and the conejo looked like regular rabbits. The latter had a death wish as they kept darting in front of the car attempting to get squashed.

Magellan Geese – White male & brown females

I had a fantastic day exploring one of the wonders of the world! I highly suggest a trip to the region if you enjoy abundant wildlife, breath-taking vistas and untamed South American wilderness.

Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades and Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add the title Blogger to the list.

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FISH FARM DIVER

Fish Market in Valdivia, Chile

Feeding our Children Eating Disorders

I was in Sobey’s the other day and noticed a new section in the meat department called Certified Humane. A gentleman was on his cell phone speaking to his wife about what meat to buy and I overheard him describing the humane beef. I had to say something and asked if he thought the cows were petted once a day. The whole thing is just another food fad scam to fleece the consumer.

I have spent a good portion of my life around the production of food. Growing up on the farm, about the only food we didn’t produce on our own was flour, sugar, salt and pepper. Grandpa used to keep bees for a sugar substitute and my aunt did grind our wheat for her bread. We raised cattle, pigs, chickens and supplemented with fish and wild game for protein. In the spring, we netted suckers running in the ditches to can. We picked wild and tame berries and crabapples in the summer and fall. We had about an acre of land for the garden, half in potatoes with the rest being a wide variety of vegetables. Mom baked about 40 loaves of bread every other week. We milked a pair of cows for milk, butter and ice cream. Mom still has two fridges, an overstuffed large freezer and four rooms in the house dedicated to storing food. Guess what, living like that is a ton of work and needs space. I find it hilarious when townies think they can sustain themselves on a small urban garden and maybe a backyard chicken or two.

Later in life, I kept sheep and worked on dairy farms. I dove on BC salmon fish farms as a ‘mort’ diver. I am an avid outdoorsman and graze as I hike in the forest or along the shoreline. I have made chips out of rock lichen and with some certainty can show you what wild mushrooms are good to eat. I have tried just about every delicacy from the ocean including sea moss, eel, sea cucumbers, abalone, urchin, geoducks, puffins, seal, shark and whale to name a few. Unlike the vast majority of North Americans, I actually know what food and beverages are supposed to taste like. I enjoy food and drink.

A serving of Chilean Abalone in Puerto Montt

What has got me so steamed like a blue mussel, is the preponderance of idiocy around food and how it is affecting young girls and boys. The food myths around antibiotics, hormones, gluten, GMOs, sugar, animal treatment, organic, cleansing, etc. are creating a generation of children with skewed values over food. I will not go into the absolute absurdity surrounding the particular hysteria over whatever ingredient is the food bogeyman of the moment. I suggest you take some time to read articles from the list of people and organizations below who are trying to enlighten people with the truth about your food vice the slick marketing campaigns from multi-national companies and activist organizations.

It may be just my anecdotal observations that my girlfriend’s daughter is around so many other girls her age with eating disorders. But I have a theory that I am witnessing the results of a more general trend of what ill-informed parents are doing to their kids. Myrtle (not her real name) decided to become a vegetarian somewhere around the age of 8. Polling shows that most vegans/vegetarians are women and their biggest concern is animal welfare. Have you heard of the phrase, ‘I don’t eat anything with a face’? Women mentally picture the animal in pain either while it is being raised or slaughtered and can’t get over that image in order to eat a steak. The anthropomorphism of animals has been hammered home for decades by activist groups, celebrities, and animal rights organizations. They scream and protest and throw blood on fur coats because they believe their Disney cartoon animals are analogues of real animals on farms and in the wild. They don’t have to be truthful, they just plaster the internet with staged videos of alleged animal cruelty with the intent of furthering their cause. A recent example of this was the howls of rage over the supposed mistreatment of a dog on the set of ‘A Dog’s Purpose’. These self serving organizations have run decades old campaigns to hoodwinked the parents on believing their ideologies and in turn have pushed their misguided beliefs down on their children.

Even using animals for their milk, eggs or honey equates to slavery or a cruel Orwellian factory setting. Raw milk fads are gaining popularity because those Holsteins are perceived as being treated to a kinder and gentler existence. People are willing to give their kids E. coli poisoning rather than drinking regular pasteurized milk. Vegans say bees and chickens being exploited if you take their eggs or honey. To be fair, when it came to chickens, my grandparents refused to buy eggs from the local Hutterites as they kept multiple hens in a single cage. Chickens peck the crap out of each other and will kill the weakest especially in a closed environment. This is why many farmers raising chickens for gathering eggs generally use a one bird/one cage method. But if you want your eggs to be affordable and available, they can’t all be free-range. Here’s a description of the pros and cons of different methods of raising chickens for their eggs: Egg Production Methods

What is really disturbing to me is how food misinformation has moved on to vegetables. What could possibly be wrong with baby carrots and broccoli? Myrtle’s father has a long list of forbidden foods and practices which include eating trans fats, white bread, processed sugar, water straight from the tap and the use of Chapstick. But coconut oil with its cholesterol issues is fine. One of Myrtle’s friends has never had anything made with processed sugar. This particular girl brings over all her own food and even water when visiting. Some of the kids for religious reasons won’t eat meat especially beef. Some of her friends are lactose intolerant. If Myrtle has a birthday party, each child has to have their own separate meal because their diets are so screwed up.

I won’t even go into how peanut butter has been outlawed in schools. Non-GMO Verified Wowbutter made from soybeans is allowed though.

I am not saying eat a Big Mac and a bag of chips every day. What I am saying is get off these food fad bandwagons and eat in guilt-free moderation. Eat a wide variety of foods and talk to the producer about where your food comes from. Large corporations like Sobey’s or A&W are needlessly spreading food fears with their high-priced marketing campaigns. Environmentalists and Luddite organizations like PETA are spreading lies about farming and hunting methods. I would suggest that farmer and hunter driven organizations like Rod & Gun clubs and Ducks Unlimited have done more for the environment and wildlife than Hollywood celebrities touting animal rights drivel.

I had a girlfriend who is celiac and legitimately had to refrain from eating or drinking gluten containing foods and beverages. Once you start looking for gluten outside of the obvious sources of bread and beer, you start to notice how much wheat is in processed foods. She was forced to make most of her family meals from scratch and to stay away from processed food in a box. But food in a box is going to have extra fillers and empty calories whether it says ‘Gluten Free’ or not. The point is to try and stay away from the boxed food in the first place.

Harvesting wheat – Bar 7 Farms, Kelwood, Manitoba

One last personal anecdote: I totally burst the bubble of an owner of a Burger King over his passion for Angus beef when I explained to him that it was just a marketing ploy. I guaranteed to him that he wouldn’t be able to taste the difference between an Angus (Red or Black), Charolais, Hereford, Simmental, or Limousin. Yes, you can tell the difference between an animal that was only grass fed. Yes, if the meat has been aged for longer, it will be tastier. In general, no beef animal tastes better than the other if raised under similar conditions. Angus was just a more manly sounding name to some marketing executive and the whole industry has swung around to it. 

A Charolais/Simmental cross from Bar 7 Farms, Kelwood, Manitoba

Enjoy food and drink, all food and drink. Try to stay away from too much processed, instant meals but drop the guilt over the occasional plate of French fries or a steak. Stop getting hooked into the latest food fad shoved on to you from the internet or super market. That food guilt is screwing up your children and will give them lifelong eating disorders over something as basic as food and water.

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Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades and Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add the title Blogger to the list.

 

CORONER’S ASSISTANT

Lady of Justice, Valparaiso Law Courts, Chile

The Insanity of Canadian Family Justice

I have become Alan Harper from the sitcom Two and A Half Men. Or Professor Crawley from The Big Bang Theory. Or Kirk Van Houten from the Simpsons.

Professor Crawley’s Ex-wife Rant – Youtube

In the space of about six months in the back half of 2016, due to the efforts of my ex-wife, her lawyers, the BC Supreme Court, and the Maintenance Enforcement Programs of BC and NS, I lost my house, most of my possessions (what I have left is in a small storage locker), my vehicle, my life savings (such as they were), was released from the military (looking for work but on unemployment) and am under constant threat of revocation of my federal licenses, driver’s license and passport. I have arrears of $63,000 and counting. If I didn’t have a good friend to put me up, I would be on the street. I am under court order to pay $1690/mth Spousal Support and $500/mth against the arrears.

I won’t go into excruciating detail of the long winding path to my present circumstances but I’ll hit the highlights of how I’ve ended up in this ludicrous situation.

In mid-2011, our marriage of 20 plus years finally came to an end. It had been on the rocks for about a decade but for the sake of the kids, we kept up appearances. We even attempted to reconcile by having her move to Manitoba where I was training as a military pilot leaving our daughter with her Comox grandparents to finish Grade 12. The ex had recently been fired from her clerk position at the Comox Air Force Wing hospital, so as she was unemployed, we decided to give the marriage one last go without the children. But we were absolutely incompatible, circumstances came to a head and she decided to leave for Comox to live with her parents taking the family car and as many possessions as she could. I was left with @$35000 in debt, 20 year old furniture and no vehicle in rural MB. I was also at a career crossroads as I had been recently ceased trained as a pilot and was attempting an Occupational Transfer to another military trade. There was no guarantee of this happening but fortunately in November, I was approved for MARS and transferred to Victoria. I was nice and had the military movers bring all her left-over personal effects to Victoria. Then I sorted and packed them up for Comox, dropping them off at her new home with her boyfriend. She has been living with the man more or less since then and they currently reside in Victoria. Under BC law, they are now common-law.

Meanwhile, since she left, I was paying down a $24000 consolidation loan, putting money against an $11000 line of credit, trying to financially help a university son with a new baby and a university daughter, keep a $2000 old clunker on the road plus my own bills. There wasn’t much left over for Spousal Support for the ex but she was healthy, had a place to live and work history in the Comox Valley.

So instead of concentrating on getting back on her feet as she was basically debt free she started borrowing money from her family so that she could hire a ‘man-hating’ lawyer. I was told of her reputation when I consulted a local lawyer. I had asked the ex to refrain from lawyers as they would siphon scarce resources away especially from the kids. To date, she has spent @$13000 and counting on her lawyers. Also, to be absolutely clear, the ex has never asked for money for the children and technically, I should have been paying Child Support while they were both under 25 and in university. During this entire ordeal, the focus has been for her to suck as much money out of me as she could.

In May 2012, I had my one and only reasonable hearing before a BC judge. Through her lawyer, we sat in court with them asking for the high end of @$2000 in Spousal Support. Here is how such a ludicrous figure can be calculated. Under the Spousal Support Guidelines, there is a formula for determining a range of Spousal Support depending on length of marriage, financial need and current respective salaries. Typically, regardless of circumstances, lawyers and judges run the numbers and the payer can be stuck with a monthly amount for life. I will get to the ridiculous lengths a person has to go to in order to vary or cease this lifetime obligation. At the time, she was going to have an annual salary of @$15000 and mine was about $50000. But when you do the calculation, every extra penny of your income gets counted. With the posting to Victoria, my salary increased due to the Post Living Differential allowance due to the higher cost of living plus the one time moving costs subsidy I received. This bumped my annual gross income to $60000 that year. The lawyer knew what she was doing and wanted to cherry pick the large spread in current incomes knowing full well that once set, the monthly amount is nearly impossible to vary. Also, she knew she had her client a ‘Golden Goose’ because I was military. Once spousal was set, if I didn’t pay the full amount, they could go to Family Maintenance for enforcement. As a federal institution, Family Maintenance can easily issue and enforce garnishment orders which the military is obligated to follow. On top of that, as a military officer, I would be due for regular built in pay increases with promotions and pay incentives. She could regularly apply for Spousal increases as my pay went up. As for me applying for Spousal decreases, I would have to prove she wasn’t looking for adequate employment. Since she was already lying through her teeth about her circumstances (more about that later) and need for Spousal, that would be nearly impossible for me to prove.

Remarkably, at this first hearing, the judge looked at the circumstances and our sorry finances and booted us out to come to a handshake agreement without the lawyers. We settled on $850/mth for Spousal plus I would take over the $11000 LOC in my name. It was a stretch financially for me and ultimately unsustainable and by October, I had to drop it back to $500. Remember those two kids in university I was trying to help out? I also co-signed a $10000 student student line of credit with my daughter and I felt it wasn’t financially prudent or possible to take out another $11000 loan. So I kept paying the consolidation loan, $770/mth, $100/mth to the LOC, some help to the kids, some extra to the ex, my own bills and continued with a grueling Navy MARS training program.

Everything more or less stabilized out for a year. She found some better work when she and the new husband moved to Victoria. I finished a major phase of training and was selected for an exchange with the Chilean Navy for five months. Then the situation started going off the tracks. A few days before leaving for Chile, my CO gets a panicked call from the ex crying she’s going to be financially destitute. I had already set everything up on automatic and had her okay that things would be fine. The call still was a black mark on my file and resulted in chats with the CO and Cox’n.

Things again stabilized out and after coming back from Chile, I was posted to Halifax late in 2013. I was getting my feet under me financially, I had moved out to the Maritimes with my girlfriend and the ex had not been making much noise. I wanted to finally sort out the divorce but a $4000 income tax bill courtesy of the higher taxes in NS hit me. I clearly communicated this to the ex and she didn’t like the fact that she wasn’t getting more money.

Early in 2014, I received about $9000 in a severance pay buy-out and to avoid a huge tax bite put the money into RRSPs. In July, as things seemed settled out financially, with a $5000 loan from the girlfriend, using the benefits of the military to cover closing costs of $6000 and using the First Time Home Buyer’s RRSP program, I bought a house. Rent in Halifax is exorbitant and my mortgage payments were equal to my past rent payments. Fast forward a few months and I was attending my son’s final university recital and had made plans to take my daughter to the Dominican Republic as a graduation gift from the Royal Military College. The ex’s true selfish greed showed once she found out about the trip. She was absolutely livid feeling that since she had never had a nice vacation like that, this was her misspent money. She was also upset about my buying a home feeling that again she was getting short shrift.

After that Christmas of 2014, she began in earnest to squeeze all the money from me as she could. I started to receive notices from her new Victoria lawyers. There was a Victoria court date in mid-August. I was right in the thick of my MARS NOPQ training and getting ready for a major fall deployment. I tried to get legal help in NS and then had to try and find legal representation in BC. Just having an hour’s worth of time is $300 a pop, so cha-ching goes the extra cash. Also, finding a divorce lawyer on the fly isn’t easy. As it turned out, I had no lawyer and a Spousal order for over $1800/mth was levied against me. I was deployed shortly after and couldn’t do anything about the order. Then she upped the ante and came after me again in December with another hearing. I found somebody to represent me at least this time last minute, deposited $3000 with his firm and got boned. Spousal support was set at $1690/mth and arrears were @$50000, oh and half my pension, thank you very much. The judge used the straight up calculation of my gross total wages of $82000 and hers of $36000 plus went back several years to calculate generous arrears. In essence, after working out taxes our gross incomes would equal out. Why should your spouse be entitled to that kind of income from you for the rest of your working life?

By my reckoning, I am ok with a certain amount of Spousal for the ex. I calculated our incomes (linked below) over the time of the marriage and historically I made @$32000/yr and she made @$17000. Using the magic formula, about $500/mth would work out. Why should she get to cherry pick my income for her benefit after the split up?

Marriage Salaries

This is where the cock and bull of women’s SOB stories are used to sway the courts in their favour. Of course, according to her affidavits, she was the only one that looked after the children, she gave up her career in order to further mine, she moved whenever I had to because of work, she was promised it would be her time to go back to school so she could have a ‘good’ job, her health, relationships, financial well-being had suffered, and on and on. For the record, I looked after the children as much as she ever did, especially when they were young. She never had to sacrifice a job for any of my jobs and the moving we did was to better locations for job seeking for both of us. As a matter of fact, when I did work for the Coast Guard in Vancouver, I commuted six hours every four days to work and back. I couch surfed and slept in closets for over three years to keep costs down as a rental room was too expensive. When I returned home, I took my four days off to again look after the kids and run the house. I took overtime when I could so that she didn’t have to work as many hours at her clerking job. Then when I joined the military, I went out on my own on Imposed Restrictions so that the family wasn’t uprooted. Our son was shortly done high school and our independent daughter looked after herself. The ex wasn’t that put out plus she was living in the home and comforts of my efforts. As for her going back to school, she wanted to quit working and have me pay for a four year university program. That wasn’t going to happen with all the debt we were in. Her affidavits were filled with half-truths and outright lies, coached by lawyers to incite sympathy from the court. I was a continent away and unable to adequately defend myself.

So this brings me to 2016 and my annus horribilis. Take your pay check and cut it in half. The ex demanded the $1690/mth or off to Family Maintenance she would go. With a mortgage payment and other bills, I wasn’t going to be able to pay this bill and afford to eat so I gave her $500/mth. So her and her lawyers made threatening calls to my CO demanding the Spousal. My CO was sympathetic but more entries into my personal file. The ex used the argument that I could write off the payments on my taxes. It takes months to set that system up through the tax office but she wouldn’t give me any time. About March, I knew I had to sell the house. At about this time Family Maintenance was starting to jump all over me. If you ever have to deal with them, they are straight up assholes and would have made perfect Nazi oven keepers. I gave them my income and expenses and they don’t care if you get to eat. Even if you’re on Welfare, they don’t force you to sell your house or take away your car. But these people don’t care if you end up living in a cardboard box, they only care about the money.

Early April there was a bizarre incident. The ex called the police and sent them to my doorstep with the story that I was going to commit suicide. Absolutely untrue but I reported it to my chain of command as is necessary.

By this time, all of the stress involved with my situation had taken a toll on my health and MARS training. My blood pressure was through the roof at around 200/120 and I was taken off the ship. It was decided I should try to transfer to another occupation. Family Maintenance started garnishing my wages for the $1690/mth and continued to pester me to pay down the arrears which were climbing. They levy heavy fines of hundreds of dollars every time you don’t pay off the full amount. I managed to sell my house at the end of July at a loss of at least $50000 due to the poor Halifax housing market. It was also at this time that my old 1999 Ford F150 finally died, so lots of transit buses for me now. I liquidated most of my possessions except for a few keepsakes that are in a storage unit and a good friend took me in.

Okay, seemed like another equilibrium, well think again! The ex was hot and heavy for those arrears monies. Unbeknownst to me, she and her lawyers were going after me again with a court date coincidentally on the day of my release mid-Dec. We had just seen one another for our daughter’s military Wings parade in Moose Jaw. I wasn’t sure of my reaction upon seeing her in person. What would you do to a person who has systematically set out to destroy your financial well-being and career? She had kept a straight face and her only slip up was when she mentioned she was still living with the now common-law husband. She had kept up the pretense that they had broken up long ago. I had actually felt sorry for her. But no, he had been living with her all this time, so I get to support the both of them. He’s a deadbeat and doesn’t make much money. Plus she has conveniently refrained from mentioning him in her affidavits.

I managed to push the latest BC court date to January 2017 and had the time to finally prepare all the forms and affidavits for my response to her latest application. According to court documents, she was in the room and asked the judge for an extra $2500/mth to be applied to the arrears I owed. Even when I was working, that would be 105% of my net pay. What shows the true colour of her black soul and lunacy of the court system is the judge thankfully only ordered $500 for arrears payments but kept the $1690/mth spousal payments in force. On EI, my total net income would only be $2000/mth. As it is, Maintenance is already garnishing 50% of my EI, so $460 to each of us every two weeks.

So at any point, do you think Family Maintenance would give me a break? Of course not! Under threat of arrest, they called me in for a Financial Examination. The ex had been telling everyone from her Member of Parliament to the heads of BC and NS Family Maintenance that I was sitting on a cash windfall from the sale of my home. Absolutely untrue and wishful thinking on her part and I sent out the documents to prove it. So after the raking over the coals with my finances laid bare for the fifth or sixth time, do you think they would stop garnishing what little income I get from EI? Of course not! Instead, I get more threats that they will take my driver’s license, federal licenses and passport away. Makes so much sense when I’m trying to find work to make it more difficult for me to be employed. Meanwhile, the counter keeps ticking as I am obviously not paying the impossible amount of Spousal plus arrears.

My last resort has been a desperate plea to the court system here in NS for some sanity. It has been an onerous, frustrating, time-consuming task to have my case even looked at. I cannot afford a proper lawyer. The court officers are not sure of what documents and forms I need. Getting one piece of paper from the BC Courts is $50 a pop. The process seems to be never ending and the screws just turn down tighter and tighter.

This is not a funny sitcom. This is my ruined life that I cannot even begin to salvage. What happened to equality? Oh yeah, when it comes to divorce, women are weak and powerless. Unfortunately, too many other men have been placed in this same position due to archaic Family Divorce Laws and outdated court attitudes. Thankfully, I didn’t have to deal with child custody. It could be worse.

Here’s a fun fact: Divorced men are many times as likely to suicide while women’s rates stay about the same. I am not suicidal but I am depressed and cannot sleep most nights. A mental health worker asked if I had access to a gun.

Men and suicide: The silent epidemic

If you want the ex’s side of the story, her name is Heidi Roberta Jensen and she lives in Victoria with her common-law husband Don Croitor. I will happily pass along her address and phone number upon request.

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Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades and Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add the title Blogger to the list.

ASTRONOMER

Death of Trust

When I was 19, I was chosen to attend the Canadian Forces Aircrew Selection unit in Toronto. There was a confluence of factors that had led me to this point where I had decided to take the first big step towards fulfilling a life-long dream. I had been seriously thinking of being an astronaut since I was 10 and I saw qualifying as a military pilot as a path towards realizing that goal. I was athletic, fairly bright and in the Physics/Astronomy program at the University of Manitoba. I did well with the Air Force’s written tests and had the eye-hand coordination to adequately ‘fly’ the ancient flight simulator. I even passed the spinning chair test. My femurs weren’t too long (your knee caps would be sheared off during ejection from the old Tutors). I was passing with flying colours; that is until the medical technicians did an ultra sound of my heart. The head DCIEM doctor, a full colonel, came to examine me. He gave me a drug to put my heart into tachycardia and when it was going about 200 beats a minute, gave a listen. He diagnosed me with a mitral valve prolapse which excluded me from pilot training. The doctor explained to me that there was some US Air Force evidence that I might pass out earlier at higher G forces due to the condition. With the dashing of my dreams, this was the moment I began my mistrust of doctors. Irrational yes, the man was just doing his job with the information at hand, but to this day my blood pressure skyrockets (it’s called white coat syndrome) whenever a doctor or BP cuff comes near me.

This sense of betrayal is fueling a lot of anger in the world. There are few institutions, organizations or professions left that haven’t been ripped apart by scandal and hypocrisy. It is long past cliché that a politician will say anything to get elected and then summarily break those promises. One of the latest examples, was how Trudeau’s promise for electoral reform was cavalierly tossed to the curb. As usual, over-the-top outrage was heard from the NDP and Green parties (For Elizabeth May, it was one of the worst betrayals she has seen) but the average Canadian just went Meh and shrugged it off as de rigueur. Surprisingly, Trump is keeping his promises and is being pilloried by media, pundits and protestors. Vegas odds are 10/13 of Lady Gaga making a political statement reference the President at the Super Bowl tonight. Politicians from municipal to federal enact the policies that affect every portion of our lives and the normalized behavior is to ridicule them no matter their stripe.

It is difficult to not develop a siege mentality with constant attacks on all communication fronts. Who picks up a ringing telephone without trepidation that it’s a telemarketer or surveyor? Email and text message spam is rampant. My mother has thousands of emails in her inbox that she hasn’t gotten to because of all the spam she’s allowed to accumulate. How many emails/Facebook messages do you receive just from friends sending you the latest Grumpy Cat meme? Would you believe Dancing Baby came out in 1996? I get at least 5 or 6 Phishing attacks daily between my phone and Hotmail. Everyone is trying to rip you off or send you time wasters and more and more of your day is being eaten up. Remember when you actually listed your name and number in a phone book? If no one was home to answer the phone, people had to come over and knock on your door or send you a letter. It is too easy and too addictive to be at everyone’s beck and call.

No profession is safe from public distain. Every action from every formerly honoured institution is being questioned in the public forums of the Facebooks, Twitters, and media (alt left to alt right). Police put a 6 year old girl in cuffs and the mother is interviewed and calls it brutality and race related. Teachers are greedy for more money. Priests abuse altar boys. Scientists are in the pocket of whichever industry their study favours. Marie Henein defends Jian Ghomeshi and she’s called a traitor to women. Judges make politically incorrect statements and are tossed off the bench. The military is full of hair trigger PTSD cases and sexual predators. Football stars are cheating with deflated balls. So many individual, concerning incidents but proportionally a tiny amount of the whole. The good work of the vast majority of people and institutions is being ignored because of the world’s obsessive laser focus on negativity.

Humans seem to possess an irrational need for perfection and apply unrealistic standards to daily life. This constant compulsion fuels the anger and is used to substantiate their arguments. Activist groups use this anti-trust psychology to further their causes. The formula is to plant a small seed of doubt with their vague and usually unprovable statements and then enlist the support of a celebrity. Actors and actresses are literally paid to pretend to be someone they are not. It is their job. Yes, they can have an opinion on whatever cause they feel strongly about but why would anyone let alone millions, slavishly believe their views and ‘expertise’? Andrew Wakefield’s discredited paper on vaccine/autism linkage would have quickly been tossed into the dustbin of scientific literature if not for the efforts of Jenny McCarthy. Anti-fish farm groups use contamination factors of a few extra parts per million and Pamela Anderson to vilify the industry. Climate change activism has enlisted all of Hollywood to push their agenda. It has become the holy grail of causes. Who wouldn’t be concerned about Mother Earth? Plus the timeline for the fruition of their claims won’t happen in our lifetime but that of our children and grandchildren. Meanwhile, banning plastic bags is going to save the planet. Take an idea and who ever shouts the loudest wins, irrespective of reasoned debate. Anger bubbles when even the basic facts are questioned since there is no trust in the ‘experts’ weighing in.

Technology and the phenomenon of the 24hr news cycle fuels much of this negativity and mistrust. ‘If it bleeds, it leads’ is the mantra of media. One bad incident or slip-up will undo years of good work and effort. The media has made a blood sport out of waiting for celebrities and politicians to do something stupid so that the very people who put them up on a pedestal can then tear them down. I know the major networks are praying for Trump to be brought up on impeachment hearings. Imagine the ratings! CBC’s The National used to be only 30 minutes in length. I grew up with the local CKX TV news having a noon and 6 o’clock report. Mostly, we were listening to the grain and cattle prices as that was our business. Occasionally, there would be a newsworthy ‘bad’ story but to fill the time it was mostly local interest items. Skipping forward to now, all these local stations are closed and the larger outlets gather in the big ‘five’ stories of the day, running them ad nausea. Look hard enough over the entire world, there’s always something bad going on. Day after day, the message being pushed is the world is burning.

Making matters worse, alternative facts and fake news is rampant. In the race to avoid being scooped, breaking news flashes around the world with little corroboration or fact-checking. The mosque shooting in Quebec immediately led with multiple gun men shouting Allahu Akbar. In my experience with Search and Rescue, the first reports of an incident are straight up garbage. Ask a cop about the reliability of witness reports. It takes time to properly investigate an incident. Unfortunately, the cycle for reporting is measured in minutes and in this latest example another anti-Muslim, we can’t trust immigrants message went out erroneously. Even with a withdrawal story, the damage is done and just shows you can’t trust the media. Long gone is the time to fact check and put some sober second thought into a story. Sensationalized first reports lead. There’s no patience for due process as hunger for the next outrageous incident is voracious.  There is no market for the little voices saying, we’re actually doing ok.

Maybe you are one of the many who have decided to shun the media because of all the negativity. Well, you have Facebook and Twitter to shout back and forth with. These mediums used to be used to let family and friends know what you’re up to. Now they are just mediums filled with politically charged memes slandering this or that group, organization, cause or person. Conspiracy theories abound and google for a few minutes and you will find some ‘evidence’ to back whatever your viewpoint is. I get exasperated when someone is particularly ignorant. An acquaintance engaged me over ‘Chem Trails’ over Vancouver Island and I couldn’t keep my mouth shut over her obstinacy. Island conspiracy groups were actually invited to come on to the Air Force Wing in Comox to physically check the aircraft for evidence of the military ‘cloud seeding’. I couldn’t believe that I had to explain to this otherwise intelligent lady the concept of exhaust.

Death of trust has come from a thousand cuts. Like me, I am sure everyone has had personal betrayals or disappointments and has trouble trusting again. But I have never been a fan of mass punishment due to the actions of a few bad apples or honest mistakes. If someone has truly wronged you or society then make a singular example and show the rest of the herd what happens when you cross the line. When the British Navy still practiced punishment with the lash, the worst cases would be taken to every ship in the fleet. Even if the miscreant was dead, the body would still receive the full measure of lashes. Broad-brushing just leads to general mistrust and bad feelings of injustice.

This shear accumulation and weight of mistrust will crumble our civilization. We need to stop taking life so seriously and worrying about so much. We need to disassociate ourselves from the negative information overload pushed on us daily from media, the internet and our cell phones. Shut everything off periodically. Believe me, you’re not going to miss anything and you’re not that important that the world will crumble without you. (Except for reading my blog, ha ha, then shut everything off) It’s easier for me as I grew up in a pre-smart phone/internet era and remember a time when I wasn’t constantly connected. Give people and organizations second, third, fourth and more chances. (Maybe not that Nigerian prince, he’s a bad dude.) Manage your expectations and accept that decisions won’t go your way for now or maybe forever. I did get a re-do at pilot training at the age of 40 as my medical issue turned out to not be an issue any more. Our instant gratification society expects resolution in the span of a 30 minute Sit Com and has forgotten how to look at the long picture. Grow some plants or sketch stars in a note book and slow your life down a bit.

Start trusting people again, accept that there will be erroneous results and forgive the occasional missteps. On a warship or aircraft, every crew member acts as part of the larger team towards a common goal. At any time during an emergency or battle, one sailor or airman could be the difference that saves the rest. People screw up all the time due to inability, inattention, indifference or fatigue. As a MARS officer, our motto was to trust but verify. Humans aren’t inherently evil and given the chance and proper motivation will generally strive to do the right thing. Just be prepared to use some prudence.

If you can’t trust anyone, there leads to anger and anarchy.

Here’s a re-post of Chris Hadfield’s positive moments from 2016 to help give you some hope.

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Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades and Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add the title Blogger to the list.

COURIER

Toronto Rush Hour Traffic

Road Habits

I am sure everyone has witnessed incidents out on the roads and highways that have made you shake your head in disbelief. There are bad drivers, bicyclists and even pedestrians who should not be anywhere near hurtling tons of metal or out of a bubble-wrapped cocoon for that matter. On top of the general lack of respect for basic physics and courtesy most of us see on the roadways, each chunk of the country has its own weird little habits, idiosyncrasies and stuff that just makes you go whaaaaaaa, did I just see that?!?

Here are my observations, good, bad and plain weird:

Manitoba
  • This is the most law-abiding province when it comes to speeding on the highways and lack of it. There are plenty of flat, open spaces with little traffic begging for a travelling speed of at least 10-30 km/hr above the posted limit. Everyone knows the usual spots on the No. 1 to slow down for the cops ie. Brandon for the Moose Jaw student pilots heading back to Portage after weekend partying. But no, more than anyone else, the average Manitoban will have that needle stuck right at the speed limit or just under.
  • But once you cross the Perimeter, Winnipeg has some of the worst drivers in the country. The ‘Prairie Turn’ comes from here ie. Going directly to the far lane without doing a proper lane change. Driving down Portage Ave, you will see plenty of lane drifters, speeders and generally a lot of bad drivers. Using blinkers seems to elude them also.
  • Outside of the City, you’ll find either the overly courteous or timid drivers. Imagine a merge lane on to a single lane. If the car merging is ahead of you and if the relative speeds are not too different, you should let the other vehicle accelerate and avoid cutting them off before the merge lane ends. Instead, you can get into a game of reverse chicken where they start slowing down, you slow down a bit, back and forth until both vehicles are almost stopped.
  • These same country drivers will pull over to check cars in the ditch especially in winter. It’s easy to freeze to death at -40 ˚C.
  • Friendly Manitoba is on the license plate for a reason. Out in the country, everyone does the finger wave to opposing vehicles.
The Manitoba Wave
 Prince Edward Island
  • Never trust a man driving with a hat!
  • Do not trust a car signaling their intent to turn until they actually start to slow down and move into the turn. More than anywhere else in Canada, drivers on the Red Sandbar will drive for miles ignoring that click-click of their blinkers.

Saskatchewan
  • A whole lot of nothing; straight, flat and boring especially in the south along the No. 1. The worst thing about driving here is passing semi’s on the one lane highways. Even in Regina and Saskatoon, there is not enough traffic to cause an over amount of friction between drivers.
  • If your eyes were good enough, you could look for the square headlights of the old Crown Victoria’s far in the distance.
Alberta
  • These are the speeders of the prairies. They had historically higher speed limits, low gas prices and a younger work force interested in getting places. They get ticketed as soon as they hit SK and MB because it is hard to slow down.
British Columbia
          Vancouver and the Lower Mainland
  • This is an area that would comfortably hold a million people but has over two. Add to the extra volume, multiple bridges, hills, curves and the occasional shot of ice and snow. Next you have a mix bag of drivers; the old and slow, the young and aggressive, prairie folks who don’t know what a curve or hill is, Asians and other immigrant groups with poor skills and shaky licensing (Dragon Driving School). The only time traffic is not heavy is at three in the morning. Finally, every Vancouverite is in a hurry to get to the next thing. Unless it is an accident, then everyone slows right down. Guaranteed, you will be in an accident in this town and gawked at by lookie-loos.
  • Here is the only place I have observed the disgusting habit of drivers at lights who open their door and spit on the pavement.
  • Slamming on the Asians again, in Richmond (Hongvouver), the gas stations all have attendants pumping your fuel as the patrons have issues working a gas pump. Also, on the ferries, the employees were told to let the Asians just park whether it is in the right spot or not.
  • Bridges, bridges, bridges. These are Vancouver’s bottlenecks and creative and aggressive merging is normal. Taking space away for bike lanes doesn’t help.
  • Not much blinker use in Vancouver other than a one-two count because typically the car in the other lane will close the gap if you give any notice.
  • Snow and ice: the rest of Canada laughs at the silly West Coasters for their inability to deal with a little ‘winter’. Poor tires, lack of practice and that need to hurry contribute to the mayhem. Intersections quickly turn to sheer ice because instead of creeping or slowly accelerating, drivers spin their tires.
Usually Vancouverites are helpful with pushing cars
  • This is one of the few places where I have seen drivers regularly cut off large trucks. Those big rigs have issues slapping on the brakes going down hills but people like to defy basic physics.
  • Driving towards Horseshoe Bay, you’ll be passed by excessive speeders headed for the ferry. Stay slow, there are plenty of cops waiting.
          Vancouver Island
  • If you are a motorcyclist, take care, all the old people can barely see over the dashboard let alone see you. The Lower Mainland is bad too but volume is the issue there. Also, stay out of the curb lane as drivers on cross streets will pull out in front of you.
  • Nice tip for bikers, you are first on and first off the ferry and there is always room. No need to hurry and risk a ticket.
  • Also as a motorcyclist, you always give the little wave to each other but never to scooters.

  • Speeding to the ferry in Nanaimo is common as is Swartz Bay outside of Victoria. The latter highway is heavily patrolled but coming down island into Nanaimo, just watch for cops in Nanoose Bay close to the PetroCan.
  • Thankfully for Island residents, the new Inland Island highway runs pretty much from south of Nanaimo to Campbell River. The four hour Nanaimo-Comox trip (or longer due to the summer tourists) was reduced to two. At 140 km/hr on the motorcycle, I had ferry to door time down to 90 minutes.
  • Live on the Island long enough and you will hit a deer or two.
  • Worst place in Canada for drivers insisting on driving in the left lane of two lane highways. No one taught them to get out of the passing lane, hence eventually the signs went up.

  • People at intersections insist on crossing opposing traffic on solid greens. Again, they need signs to remind them that this is a really dumb practice.
  • Some of the worst tailgaters are found here.
  • Lots of hydroplaning opportunities due to the high rainfall.
  • There are a significant number of long-boarders using residential roads for boarding, not the safest of endeavors.
          BC Interior
  • Hills, summits, curves, avalanche season that lasts into April; this is some of the toughest driving in Canada.
  • Tourists and drivers with Alberta plates piss everyone off with their slow driving on curves backing up traffic. Then on the straight-aways and passing lanes, they speed up so people can’t get away from them.
  • Semi-trucks travel fast in the interior, stay out of their way.
Clearing the Kootenay Pass
Ontario
          Northern Ontario
  • Slower drivers on two laners will pull over to the shoulder to let traffic pass. Two thumbs up!
          The 401
  • Most drivers will pull to the left lane to let traffic merging on the right come in.
  • Unlike the Prairies where blinking headlights mean ‘Head’s Up, Cops’, blinking lights in your mirror mean get out of the lane because a faster car is coming. On the 401, the far right lane is for the speed limit and each lane to the left is faster by 10 km/hr.
  • Sun, rain, sleet, fog, ice; there is no slowing down on this highway. This is why they have multi-vehicle pile-ups regularly.
Quebec
  • These are the worst speeders in all of Canada. The government had to come down hard with high fines to slow the Francos down.
  • Worst place for motorcycle insurance as accident rates due to speed were too high.
  • If you are a bicyclist out on the rural roads that do not have paved shoulders, good luck! Unlike most other provinces where vehicles will pull out a bit to pass you, Francos pass as close as they can about a foot away.
          Montreal
  • Every last one of these drivers are crazy! But they are all crazy and that makes them predictable. If you make room for one vehicle to merge, five will scoot in ahead of you. Just be prepared to drive aggressively.
  • Pedestrians will jaywalk at will and will just trust that vehicles will miss them.
  • Just to screw with the Anglos, for some reason you could not turn right on red in the province. That has been reduced to just the Island of Montreal now. Still makes no sense.

New Brunswick
  • Except for the in-bred hillbillies in the Miramichi region and the moose in the interior, this is another province with sparse traffic.
Nova Scotia
  • Tourist traffic down-line to Yarmouth slows traffic and the main highways need more twinning. The Cobequid Pass can be treacherous in the winter.
The Cobequid Pass is rough on Semi’s
          Halifax
  • Bluenosers in the city are some of the worst drivers and pedestrians in Canada.
  • People have to be taught how to walk in this town. There’s a government initiative called ‘Heads Up Halifax’ aimed at pedestrians to pay attention. There are red flags for people to carry across pedestrian activated cross walks.

  • One of the most dangerous practices is vehicles crossing left in intersections in front of oncoming traffic. I guess they just assume people will slow down instead of T-boning them.
  • Another danger on the streets are bicyclists in all weather conditions. The roads are not built for them to be there let alone in a snowstorm travelling Quinpool or the Bedford Highway.
  • A particularly annoying habit is drivers sitting at a red light in the left lane and just as the light goes green flicking on their turn signal. Now you are stuck for a stop-light cycle when you could have been in the right lane and on your way.
  • There are lots of no-look merging on to main streets and poor or no use of blinkers.
  • Pedestrians will sit on the curb if they do not see the white walking man. The reasoning is the red hand means you can’t cross with the green light. This creates confusion for a vehicle turning across the pedestrian crossing area.
  • Also with pedestrians, too often when they have the right of way, they will wave at you to cross. With oncoming traffic, a misunderstanding will lead to an accident. Then there are plenty of places like Robie Street where pedestrians think they have the right of way and cross where they shouldn’t.
  • Turning is difficult for Halifax drivers. When turning right, unless you are a large truck, you do not need to swing wide to the left partially into the other lane to avoid clipping the curb. At an intersection with two lanes, a vehicle from each way can pull into side by side lanes. This is difficult for many drivers here.
  • Round-abouts: If you want some cheap entertainment with your meal, eat at the Armview patio and watch the idiocy of the Armdale Rotary. Congestion, poor drivers, pedestrians, and badly placed bus stops contribute to the general mayhem and numerous accidents.
Armdale Rotary without congestion
  • If you still do a bit of drinking and driving, there aren’t many Check Stops, even during the Christmas season. Vancouver and Victoria have plenty but one of the only ones I have seen in Halifax was on a Sunday morning after the Men’s Olympic Gold medal game.
  • I want to find the driver instructor who told people to stop a full car length or more back from the intersection stop line.
Newfoundland
  • Watch out for MOOSE everywhere! Except during hunting season, then you won’t see any.
That is a really angry looking Newfie moose!

So that is the weird, crazy, dangerous and sometimes courteous road habits I have observed, coast to coast. Comment if you have additions for your part of Canada.

Blair is a personification of a ‘Jack of All Trades & Master of None’. He has held several careers and has all the T-shirts. Time to add Blogger to the list.

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